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Entertainment / Humor

The fuss over the pie

Zadolba!whether 26.12.2020 at 05:48

Angry look on the other side of the counter

The eve of the New Year. Most companies have a summary of the work for the whole year. With the payment of the corresponding bonuses, or, respectively, vice versa. And then they appear — three categories of people.

The first category is "whiners". They say: "I worked all year from 9 to 18, I came to work on time, I left work on time, I always came sober, I followed the rules, but I didn't get a bonus." Yes, but for the whole year you have not fulfilled any of the planned indicators. Only you know what you've been doing all year. Yes, you've had months in which you've worked well, but there have been months in which you've worked shitty. In total, not a single indicator has been met for the whole year. "I don't care about these indicators, I followed all the rules," he says, "What do you mean, I didn't fulfill the plan of the year? Yes, I'm all of you..."

The second category is "old-timers". "I have been working in this company for 20 years since its foundation, yes, I know both the CEO and the deputies here, yes, I was at the christening of his cousin… Yes, I know here who the husband of the chief accountant sleeps with, and if I tell his daughter who his cousin's granddaughter sleeps with… Yes, I'm going to complain to the CEO now and he will deprive you all of the bonus. What does "write a statement" mean? Yes, I'm all of you..."

And the third category is "Refuseniks". "You yourself work on New Year's Eve, fools, and I need to drink vodka, drink cognac, put my face in a salad. I don't care about your three salaries for working on holidays. Yes, you already owe me for the rest of my life. Oh, what do you mean, this snotty puppy will get my bonus for not drinking in the New Year? Of course, he doesn't have a family, children, then you can stay at work on New Year's Eve and every evening. And I also have a garden, a vegetable garden, a cottage, three dogs. And I also have a job description, according to which I… What does "0% efficiency" mean? Yes, I'm all of you..."

AND this very 22-year-old "snotty puppy" who has been working for only two years in the company, who goes to work when it is convenient for him, exceeded the plan by 50% at the end of the year, for which he received a solid bonus, and is also ready to work in the New Year, for which he will receive a triple salary by the decision of the management. He has already bought a new car for himself and has taken a three-room apartment on a mortgage, having saved up for the initial payment in just a few months.

Including at the expense of you whiners, old-timers and refuseniks who do anything but work all year round.

AND you have no idea how fucked up you are.

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